Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Shampoo Bottles

I know that there have been numerous studies done on the teenage brain. Sleep, school starts, peer pressure, bullying, food intake, food outake, GPA, college entrance essay, but there is only one study I'm really interested in.

Somebody with some credentials behind their name needs to tell me why teenagers never, and I mean NEVER, get rid of an empty shampoo bottle in the shower. You go to clean the thing and they're falling on your head, into the tub and over the tub, and all of them are empty. I've gone so far as to call family meetings about this and the guilty look up from Facebook and nod and it feels as though my message is getting through. Not so as nodding is nothing more than a coping mechanism for teenagers with pain-in-the-ass mothers.

Some families have mission statements regarding the direction they want their family to go spiritually, financially and academically. I'm merely asking not to get hit in the head by a plastic bottle and since all previous methods have failed, I've decided to adopt the mission statement practice as well.

IF YOU LEAVE AN EMPTY SHAMPOO BOTTLE IN THE SHOWER, IT WILL NOT BE REPLACED WITH A FULL ONE. YOUR HAIR WILL BEGIN TO SMELL LIKE DOG AND YOU WILL NEVER GET A DATE WHICH WILL MAKE IT IMPOSSIBLE TO LEAVE THIS HOUSE AND GET AWAY FROM YOUR PARENTS. THIS CAN HAVE ONLY THE WORST RESULTS FOR BOTH OF US. THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

Too wordy?

How about this? You need to clean up after yourself, so help me God.

3 comments:

  1. Kathy, wondering why your family isn't jumping on this one, filing comments-aplenty? Because they are busy using all but the last two squares (not counting the glued-on one) of toilet paper on the roll in the guest bathroom.

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  2. When I'm cracking on my peeps, I don't always announce it :)

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  3. No hair... no shampoo. I do need body shampoo though... that's where my hair migrated. I think it is that 4% Neanderthal in me.... Yuck

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