Sunday, July 24, 2011

Cracking the Code

The Big Daddy started biking ten years ago in order to get in better shape.  He rode back and forth to work, which was ten miles round-trip.  When a few years had gone by, he got asked to join a bike team forming at our church that would ultimately ride the MS150 every September.  When this happened, the biking got serious.  Through these last many years, I have lived with this passion of his and picked up some of the terminology and what it means.  For those of you not familiar with it, I will decipher it for you:

  • I have a training ride.  I will be gone the entire day and won't be worth squat when I get back.

  • We had a man go down.  Somebody fell off their bike and went wee, wee, wee all the way home.

  • Pete's got this thing on his bike..........  I want Pete's bike.

  • I'm doing a charity ride this Saturday.  I'm paying more than retail for a cool new jersey and by the way, I won't be worth squat when I get home.

  • Joe's got this new bike............  I want Joe's bike.

  • I got dropped.  The cool kids took off without me.

  • Gary got a new bike that has..............  I want Gary's bike.

  • He's bailed for tomorrow.  His wife started chasing him with a butcher knife when he told her he was going out biking with the boys again so he reconsidered the idea.

  • These bikes now have electronic shifters.  I want a new bike.

  •  Touched base with my BSG.  Bike store guy, like a BFF, only better.

  • Riding a century tomorrow.  I'm spending all day riding 100 miles and will not be worth squat upon return.     

  •  The guy bonked.  He saw dead people.

  • I was in this peloton and we were cooking.  A bunch of bikers rode real close and real fast and it was glory days, baby, glory days.

  • You should see the bike John just got.  Oh please, oh please, oh please.

There's plenty more, but in an effort to neither bore nor overwhelm, I'll save it for another time.  And believe me, there is always another time.

  • Ya have to admit, I don't ride that much compared to other guys.  I'm full of crap, tightly contained in this handsome Spandex.


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  3. Love the translations! I'm the rider in my family, and I'll keep my old bike---but I want your blue shirt! :)

    (Sorry for the first two deleted posts. I was feeling very indecisive this morning.)