I saw Ken the other day raking about five leaves in the yard, and he stopped to chat and wish me, my family and my little dog, too, the best Christmas ever. And a wonderful New Year because I have been so kind to him over the years. No, I haven't, Ken. You're being delusional. We talked about our plans for the holidays and all was friendly until he said this..........
"I had the idea to watch for you so I could run out with some mistletoe and give you a Christmas kiss."
Ken, Ken, Ken, that's a dumbass idea. And if I were you, I'd be real careful because Barbie's watching you right now from the window of her dream kitchen, and sharpening the knife she's going to use to Bobotize your molded plastic Manhood if you don't stop hitting on chicks walking their dogs.
Merry Christmas. You're welcome. Now I have to find a new route.